Tuesday, July 28, 2009

They say I'm Crazy?

Watched the movie "A Beautiful Mind" today during abnormal pychology class although I have seen it before. If you have not heard of it, it's based on a true story, a Nobel Laurette specializing in Mathematics and Economics named John Nash who suffers from schizophrenia. It makes me want to understand more about what general public perceives about people who are "abnormal" because some of them are exceptionally talented in certain fields. It has always been hard to define, to draw a line to part sanity from insanity. We avoid using negative words because we don't want to impose stigma to people whom we think are different from us. In this more individualistic era (although we still live in a collective society), we are trying to be different by enforcing a sense of self, style, uniqueness etc. But have we not forget just as every other person is just as unique, we don't have the right to discriminate others (in this context, people whom we call "crazy"). I mean, they didn't ask for it either.

Sometimes, it really is the mind, a thought even though just for a second. I'm sure many of us have asked ourselves "Is it normal if I think/behave like this?" or "Am I out of my mind?". Hence, we build walls, we start to have our secrets, maybe secrets which we would not share with others (just because we don't want others to have stigma on us). While only one thought or one behaviour maybe "too unique", it's doesn't mean the person is simply "problematic". We'll have to look into the extend and frequency of the thought or behaviour not to forget the context the person is in.

Thanks to our immune system, we may recover soon after some time. Others may be less fortunate as the degree of recovery differs from one to another. Bear in mind that all these "mental disorders" that we've known are accumulated over a certain period of time. You don't catch it just like you would catch a flu. Once it gets serious, it may be very hard to cure. Hence prevention is better than cure. Seek help when you need to, seriously (and this is not intended for any publicity purposes). Trust me, if mental disorders can be as infectious as influenza A (H1N1), the hazard it brings will be much much much complicated. Quarantine will not be helpful because it's hard to control thoughts and behaviors. Moreover, psychiatric treatments are expensive and extensive. Recovery in a week is 99% negative.

It is, a pity that many people do not realise that what the problems they have. Most people always think I HAVE NO PROBLEMS. Is that possible? The possibility is, you may not see it as a problem while others may. Sometimes, we may be so used to the way to think or act that we don't see the flaws in ourselves. But when it comes to others, we're really good at spotting their weaknesses. When was the last time you did this?

Well, I just did it this morning. I woke up and realised that the toilet in my floor was "flooded" with dirty water. Must be some problematic girls who don't have the courtesy to keep the public place clean resulting in blockage AGAIN. She/They do whatever's convenient for them and ignore others' rights to enjoy a clean toilet. So they throw things in whichever place they like leaving others to feel gross about the end result/to clean up for them (I'm the one who usually file complaints to the office while some other floor mates could have just pretended nothing happened). While people may think that "crazy" people brings troubles to the "normal" people, some who think they're equally "normal" can also create hassles for others.
Is this considered a problem/faulty behavior? You decide.

suddenly, I'm thinking of this question...

Is Love Free?

Thursday, July 23, 2009


Alright, this a very serious. Mind your perception. What is perception? It is one of the components that forms concepts in short. Although abstract, we're using it everyday. With perception, the speed of us making decisions can be much faster. Our senses are pretty much facilitated by our perception such as distance judging. For example, when you hold on to something hot you sense the heat. And the next time you see the same thing again, your mind tells you "Careful, HOT". In other words, it helps us to relate. Another example, when you see a red heart, you may relate it to love.
But, that's not what I'm trying to say here.
What I'm saying is that, even after 46 years Sarawak joined the Federal of Malaya, some people (West Malaysians) still have this perception that East Malaysia is a very very very very very (need I add in some more "very"s?) underdeveloped place. The most often heard one would be, "People there still live on trees ar?" The truth is, even though we really have many virgin forests, we have many tribes, but most of the tribes are now opened to education etc. Ok, if you think that some of the Bumis still live in Longhouses, yes, they do. And NO, I have not known anyone who lives on a tree in Sarawak yet.
And like I said, this live on tree topic is already too "outdated" and I believe since now "Everyone can fly" and fly to Sarawak, this myth should have been justified. The more interesting one that I hear today is...a West Malaysian asked a Sarawakian, "Are you used to wearing shoes here?"
Well, this question is not pointed to me obviously. And luckily it wasn't or else that person could have tasted my shoes! Come on, this is so TOTALLY ridiculous!!! Who says Sarawakians don't wear shoes? I know I'm overreacting but I can't accept it unless the logic is,
Premise 1. Sarawakians live on trees.
Premise 2. Sarawakians need to climb trees.
Premise 3. Wearing shoes makes it hard for us to climb trees.
Conclusion: Sarawakians are not used to wearing shoes.
I don't know what was portrayed in our Geography textbooks or what the Geo teacher has taught this innocent child (anyway, I just hear the story and I don't even know who this person is) but that is really an assault to all the shoestores, department stores and even hypermalls that sell shoes in Sarawak, not to forget the millions of people who wear shoes in Sarawak. Let me clarify myself. I have been wearing shoes since I was two. Too bad I don't have the photo with me now. But I have a more recent one and it was taken in Bau, Sarawak.

These (circled in red) are not shoes. These are sandals and yes, that's very weird because how come a community which does not wear shoes is able to differentiate between shoes and sandals?

Ok, perhaps this picture is more familiar to those who have not been to Sarawak. Ibans in their traditional costumes is widely portrayed in most Geography books, or advertisements. Largely, that's what shapes the perception. But in this picture, all the girls are in sandals or slippers.
Also, note that our roads are tarred! Other than that, no need for me to explain on the buildings/infrastructures etc. The internet is soooo convenient these days that anyone can find info about Sarawak or Sabah at the tip of fingers.

See? It's good to learn more. Be humble, like this uncle :)

Monday, July 20, 2009

I need to sleep on time!!!

I should be sleeping now, seriously...what's wrong with my biological clock?

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

The Bike Trip to Damansara

Went to Damansara with Poh Fen last Saturday. It was a wonderful experience. Will have the pictures do the description.
Firstly, we had dinner at Ikea.

Self-service but I was honoured to have been served by Poh Fen :p


It's the beef ball with chips. The sauce taste super great! And this is the first time I eat french fries with strawberry jam. I thought it would be wierd but NO...it tasted perfectly delicious. Btw, you get 5 beefballs with chips for RM5, 10 for RM 10. Hence, if you'd like more chips, may order 2 plates of 5 beefballs. 10 is just nice for dinner.

Smoked salmons. Looks better than its taste. RM 15.90. We wish it had more sauce. And yes, I agree with Poh Fen, salmon tastes better in Japanese restaurants in the form of sashimi :)

After dinner, we stroll around because we had nothing better to do. Some cute soft toys. They can be weird (can't tell what animals they are).

This one can make a good bolster. It's long.

Haha...funny creature.

Poh Fen loves this one. Erm...I think it needs anti-aging cream to clear away its wrinkles though.

Kids' corner. This boy is really cute. :)

This girl acting cute... I love this teddy bear which costs RM300++
Acting cute again?

Oh, I just love those pinkish bedrooms. Match with my cardigan so well that I feel like the room was mine at instance. I decided to take the picture to make it mine forever....ah~

This one is even pink-ER! I like!!!

I think my future room shall look something similar to this. Simple and sweet (and has to be spacious to store my stuff).

The room Poh Fen like most. It's a little more "masculine" due to it's simplicity.
Erm...no idea what this is. Just some toy I guess or maybe decoration.
A clean and comfortable kitchen. Like the waterlilies a lot.
It's claimed that Ikea's furniture are durable. For the chair, it can be seated 30 times per day and lasts for at least ten years. Sounds like a good investment.
Saw this as I exit. I doubt that as they can't count me in. I mean no matter how nicely designed the cupboards are, I can still be very DISORGANISED.
Outside the building. I'd love to have this in my garden some day.
Nice set up.

I want this in my balcony where I can sit there and look up into the sky and sipping a cup of hot drink while listening to some soft music. I think I need a BIG balcony when I have my own house...hahaha.
After that, we discovered this. WooHoo~ no image la...no one looking pun...
I become a "bulb". Alright, I forgot how old I was...Seriously, sometimes I still thought I'm still 21. I lose count of my age occasionally. That's how bad my Maths is.

My tauke nio. The Hot girl who rides motorcycle and brings me to makan angin :D And did I mention? This is the highlight of this whole post!
Our next desitination after Bandar Utama, Mont Kiara... Tada~Solaris! Well, something stupid occured here. While this area is mainly for the higher-income groups (who are unlikely to ride motorcycles most probably), we (2 adventurous, currently-don't-have-car-in-KL girls) were having some problems looking for a place to park the vehicle. Takkanlah park next to the Porche or Ferrari?
Just then, we spot a place where there were several motorcycles. Wah, we were so happy but couldn't find a way up cause it was on a pedestrian. Poh Fen then drove around to figure how to park at that place. Suddenly, she reversed and exclaimed, "I saw the slope to get up already!" Wow, I was also very happy because we can finally park the motorcycle and then start exploring the place! So, we went up...rode by and passed TEN shoplots and also several passerbys until we reach the parking site and realised that there was another slope near that parking place.
-_-" sweat, and embarassed (after riding on the pedestrian from one end to the other) because customers from one of the restaurants looked at us, puzzled.
Ah well, nevermind about the stupidity. We found the place...TENJI!!! The place we're going to have our lunch on 31st of July!!! Hooray~ *forgets the embarassing incident that just occured*
Nice view over there actually. Ideal for couples too.

I kind of like this but the lights somehow doesn't allow me to take a nice picture with it.

Looks like a romantic cafe. Has a very sentimental atmosphere.

I like the signboard.

Wall of one restaurant.

After that, we toured few other places such as Sri Hartamas,Bukit Damansara, got lost in some places which we have no idea where and finally Bangsar and back to UM. I really enjoyed the ride at night because there were so few cars and I got to look at people driving with a clearer view. Spot some handsome drivers too :D Poh Fen wanted to faint when I told her that LOL~ ok, maybe they pass by so quickly that I perceive so many of them as "handsome".
Also, people look at us too. They may find female motorcyclists rare I guess. And this is so far the longest trip I have on a motorcycle. I think the record will only be broken if we ride to Melaka...hohoho. In fact, this marks one of my wackiest experiences in UM. I couldn't help but to smile non-stop because I was over-excited in spite of me I bumping along with the motorcycle several times as I didn't hold on tight and that the helmet I wore was actually too big for me, lucky that I didn't fly off...what a night!

Friday, July 10, 2009

An odd hangout place of mine

Just a few days ago, I was complaining about all the bad luck I was experiencing. Besides the crowded room, I was chosen as the floor rep without my consent. Then, I went to the library to borrow some academic books but the system was down so we were only allowed to borrow 2 books. That made me look like a fool when I carried the whole big pile of books to the counter and was laughed by the librarian. Great, not like I was informed.
This morning I went again and the system recovered! I was so happy that I couldn't stop giggling. Happy because I get to borrow MORE books...yeah~

It's not just about borrowing books from the library, I like to hang out in the library for no reason. Perhaps I like its clamness and quietness (although it can be spoilt by some users who apparently do not know about the etiquettes of using a library sometimes). If I'm really lucky enough, I still get to spot some handsome guys :D Well, I don't think I've come across any handsome guys in my faculty, unless they're passerbys (that's why so happy). But that's one of the small small attractions only. What do I do in the library? Read newspapers, journals, looking up for books and sometimes only. I don't do revision there because during study week it's too crowded. I like it when it's quiet and spacious.

One of the things I do. Lazy to copy, so just snap the pages I want.

I think I have fallen in love with the library, for no reason. Perhaps I like the smell of the books?Sniff sniff and I might be wiser, haha! Or maybe the books in UM's library can be so old they sometimes look like mysterious treasure to me. I don't know. Usually I borrow many books, the maximum is ten and I put good use to it. The part where I have to carry all the books back to college can be quite challenging because they're really heavy, maybe up to 6 kilograms (or more). I have spoiled a few bags due to that. You may think I'm really hardworking and book-loving, do you? Erm...I probably enjoy the process of finding out the books and sit on the library floor and carrying that big pile back from the library more interesting. I barely have the time to finish all the books. I've been spending more than half of my time in Uni joining activities and attending meetings. Other than that, I go out to relax (shop and eat).

Sitting on the floor between racks of books, taking down the call number of the book.
Nevermind if I cannot finish all these books, I can just read the summary :D and some times I regret not being able to finish the books until exam's over. How to pass exams without reading books? Erm...selective reading+ common sense+ being attentive in class?

The shell featured in this picture is REAL. The one printed on the cover of the book looks like its reflection, doesn't it? And that's what I do with the books. Not only are they readable, they're multi-purpose.

It's weird I don't have any pictures of the library since I like it so much. This pic is stolen from the official website. It's too small though. I used to have a pic of its interior which is smokey. I suspect part of it was on fire. Where's that photo?

Well, this is the only one I can find. Even that, the library becomes the background.

Thursday, July 09, 2009

Revising a bit of Chemistry

I'm so happy with the wifi here that I forget about bathing...Oops...
That reminds me of my body shampoo. I used it this afternoon to wash my container (which I use to store my lunch). My current room mate thinks that's very irrelevant (and absurd) but I disagree because they're both soaps. My logic: body shampoos SHOULD be better than dish washing liquids because they're composed of higher quality chemicals so that they're not too harsh on skins. Besides, there are vit. A, E etc and even have moisturising or lightening effect and smells better too!
Can anyone give me an answer or a justification? I need something more scientific.

Sodium laureth sulfate, or sodium lauryl ether sulfate (SLES), is a detergent and surfactant found in many personal care products (soaps, shampoos, toothpaste etc.). It is an inexpensive and very effective foaming agent.[1]
Extracted from Wikipedia. It has an alkyl group which attract to oily matters and a hydrophillic head which attracts water. When rinsed with lots of water, the water insoluble substances will be washed off. That's how the cleansing works. I hope I'm not wrong. Haven't been reading on Chemistry for 3 years plus.

So, SLES can be found in many cleansing products which creates foam. That means these two chemical products share the same ingredient but maybe of different composition and additives. Since dishwashing liquids are sold at a much lower price compared to body shampoo, cost of the chemical content should be more economic and effective too (to wash away stubborn stains). That makes sense now? Although it still sound stupid for that friend who's doing chemistry. But it's ok for me to sound stupid here simply because I'm not a Chemistry student and I don't have a bottle of dishwashing liquid with me right now so I can't really compare the content of both (I like to read the ingredients of daily products when I'm free. We're using so much chemicals each day). I left mine (a big bottle) in the room last semester and my ex-room mate is keeping it for me. I'll get it back tomorrow. Yeah!

Wednesday, July 08, 2009

Trickiness of picking a nickname

Last night I was eating with Xin Min, Louise and Tong Tong. Xin Min happened to be the "pemantu Mahasiswa" for the freshie's orientation week so she updated me on the on and offs in college. She said there's this guy who introduced himself as Teo Teo (his surname). That's way too cute a name for a guy! As I was facebooking with Poh Fen just now, I realise that my id appears as Ng. Normally, I won't introduce myself as Ng. I usually call myself Shan for short. Then, I ter-thought of this Teo Teo... imagine if I'm Ng Ng......

Tuesday, July 07, 2009

After that, putting things aside...

First of all, HAPPY BIRTHDAY, OWEN!!!

Just happen that I get to blog after such a long time and my trip Sabah and what a coincidence it's Owen's birthday. I am a little free tonight, so free that I read Kenny Sia's blog. I'm not his fan but read it like not more than 5 times in a year? Some of his fans are surely quite devoted, they almost write an essay in their comments.
That's the free time part.
Lecture started on Monday. Got assignments flowing in already. What am I going to do this semester. Feel so free, yet so busy, a mixture of complicated feelings. I feel like I'm younger? haha...less responsibilties? Oh yeah~ Let the 2nd year students do all the things I've done...YES YES YES!!! Although I sometimes can't help but still grip on to them. Ok...cool girl, cool.
There's always resolution for a new year, so here's my sem's resolution. Will inspect this list after the sem.

1. Enjoy life. (not that I had not been enjoying life but I just want to be happier)
2. Trip Penang or Melaka
3. Have meal at Tenji
4. Remain in the dean's list
5. Join Mensa
6. Meditate more
7. Jog/ do some sports at least thrice a week for at least half and hour
8. Buy myself a decent wallet and bag, best if they match : )
9. Fight chapped lips and fatigue
10. Produce at least one academic article
11. Again, read more books
12. Earn some money so that I get buy myself a decent camera
13. Oh, I almost forget...to be a nice senior : )
Some people dislike the number 13, but I'm fine with it, so I'm not gona cut or add in.

Erm, look more like a to-do-list to me...ah, well...basically that's more than enough of what I could do within this semester while I'm here. At least I don't feel purposeless, right? Oh yeah, should join a great Christmas party too! But before that, I have to look for volunteers...clients for my counselling sessions. Anyone? It's totally FREE :D (ok, I know it doesn't sound as attractive as the Mega Sales or free facial and massage by professional beauty salons, maybe...)
OK...that's part and parcel of what I could think of now, will continue next time.

Here I Am

Here I am in my room.
I'm not so sure if this is my room.
No possession is eternal, they can never be mine forever.
Life sucks when there are too many uncertainties.
But here I am, at the corner of this room
At least I have a bit of my privacy.
Some of my room mates don't even have a bed, I'm considered lucky.
I hadn't been smiling so much this few days,
I hope this is the only reason why I have been a little moody.
I've even thought of moving out.
till then, I tell myself, perhaps I've never really liked this place because of its population density
wifi problems, water shortage, break-ins, and now,
we are cramped as if we're in a refugee camp.
It's really ridiculous, that this is somehow due to RMK-9 .
There's nothing they can do,
so we're suppose to change our habits to adapt to this situation,
This is just one of the most filthy reasons they use to shut us up.
Talk about a student's rights?
I'm to tired for all this.
I just want a peace of mind and think of all the wonderful things that are ahead of me.