Sunday, September 07, 2008

Breaking my habits

Woke up early morning even though I went out for supper with my college friends till late last night. I wish there is a day when I can sleep until I can wake up naturally but this seems impossible for this year. Sigh…loaded with all kinds of work from different activities. Since when have I become a machine who sits in front of my laptop and type on and on by referring to something called a “to-do-list” so that I can have all the items on it cancelled at the end of the day. This is so not me. My outings are usually short and rushed. I even have to consider if I should go out due to the chores undone. I sometimes envy those who are so free that they can just sit in front of the laptop to watch drama series or listening to songs.

How long have I not been updated with the newest songs? Long enough until I just realize that Linkin Park’s latest album “Minutes to Midnight” which was actually released last year to be so pleasant to listen to. I love “Leave out all the rest” and “Shadow of the Day” best. So not like the old Linkin Park who used to scream in their songs but still so nice. Just like the me who used to be so laid back and carefree but have to abide to the responsibilities attached to me now. I have been tamed without being aware of it at all. Been tied by invisible ropes called duties and responsibilities. I even wonder why have I become so autonomous and even offer to take down some of the tasks. People change I guess. Instead of going out to have fun, I have to close myself in my room for self-entertainment. I just discovered a few ways to release stress. Eating chocolate and listening to soft music especially oldies. Been downloading English oldies which I was not even interested in back then. Been eating chocolate like it’s a medicine that cures overwork minds. Chocolate works miraculously for me to beat stress. A piece of chocolate a day keeps moodiness away but I hope I don’t welcome diabetes instead. And did I say I am experiencing sleep deprivation? Being a person who enjoys quality sleep so much shouldn’t be giving up on such a great hobby. Worse, communication with others has been reduced. Most of the time I deal with others, it has to be about the things to be done. I wish I can just sit down and talk crap.

Hmm…I think I should cut the chores I have in hand a little so that I feel more comfortable. I guess when it comes to group work, I just need to distribute some of the parts to others, I guess I have been to idealistic that I make sure all the things done should be the best but barely do I realize that it could be ideal in my opinion but not in other’s. So I should try to believe in others in the team. Yeah, that’s what I will do. Easy…easy, don’t get too tensed.


At 12:35 AM, Blogger curryegg said...

so free that they can just sit in front of the laptop to watch drama series or listening to songs?

Lol.. are you referring to me? kekekz.. :P

Btw, shan.. don't worry... the sem will end soon and you can wake up naturally by then... :)

At 4:31 PM, Blogger Shan said...

now holiday i can watch drama sampai puas-puas...guess i m too free after all, have to find something beneficial to do liao


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